HurricaneGirl
04-10-2008, 09:39 AM
#2
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "Hey You wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
#1
The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the
background checks, interviews and testing were done,
there were 3 finalists. Two men and one woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men
to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must
know that you will follow your instructions no matter
what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find
your wife sitting in a chair.. Kill Her!!'
The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never
shoot my wife.'
The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for
this job. Take your wife and go home.'
The second man was given the same instructions. He
took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for
about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his
eyes, ' I tried, but I can't kill my wife.'
The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take
your wife and go home.'
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the
same instruction, to kill her husband. She took the
gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one
after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging
on the walls
After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened
slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat
from her brow. 'The gun is loaded with blanks' she
said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'
Moral:
Women are evil.
Don't mess with them
:innocent
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "Hey You wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
#1
The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the
background checks, interviews and testing were done,
there were 3 finalists. Two men and one woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men
to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must
know that you will follow your instructions no matter
what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find
your wife sitting in a chair.. Kill Her!!'
The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never
shoot my wife.'
The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for
this job. Take your wife and go home.'
The second man was given the same instructions. He
took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for
about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his
eyes, ' I tried, but I can't kill my wife.'
The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take
your wife and go home.'
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the
same instruction, to kill her husband. She took the
gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one
after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging
on the walls
After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened
slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat
from her brow. 'The gun is loaded with blanks' she
said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'
Moral:
Women are evil.
Don't mess with them
:innocent